RUBI voters

Who the hell are the RUBIs, and why did they just vote Trump back in?

by Sir Hogendobler | Nov 12, 2024

I’m here to rant about the 2024 election because, seriously, what the fuck just happened? As a life-long Progressive Democrat and enthusiastic Kamala Harris supporter, I felt like I got kicked in the teeth when Trump won. How could this possibly be real? How could anyone, let alone millions of women, minorities, and anyone with two brain cells, vote for this guy that treats them like shit? Well, I wanted answers, and I’ve come up with a theory that’s both disturbing and darkly fascinating.

Disclaimer

I’m no political scientist or journalist. I’m just a dad with two daughters trying to make sense of this chaos. I’m aware that I’m probably oversimplifying things here. Just hang with me, because I promise there’s a wild ride ahead. And yeah, some of this might sound a little politically incorrect, but hey — this is some dark shit, and we need to be real if we’re ever going to figure it out.

Setting the Stage: Who Voted?

Let’s break down the voters into three groups:

  1. Die-hard Democrats who love Kamala and would show up no matter what.
  2. MAGA maniacs who’d vote for Trump if he set the country on fire.
  3. And here’s the kicker: a third group who voted Trump despite not being MAGA or even Republican. This third group is the one that shocked everyone and has me questioning humanity.

So why did this third bunch vote for a guy who treats them like garbage? Brace yourself for the ugly truth: they don’t know him. Seriously. They’re clueless. They think he’s just a rich, successful, tell-it-like-it-is businessman who somehow made their lives better back before COVID. That’s it. These are our RUBIs: Radically Uninformed and Blindingly Inattentive.

Who Are These RUBIs?

Let’s make this real clear: RUBIs aren’t MAGA nutjobs. They’re not the ones chanting “Build the wall!” and dreaming of a 1950s America that never even existed. Hell, I don’t think they’re even politically affiliated in any traditional sense. They’re just everyday people who are so ridiculously checked out, it’s scary.

  • Radically Uninformed: They don’t know jack shit. They’re not missing just a few facts, they’re oblivious to reality.
  • Blindingly Inattentive: These folks don’t even notice what’s going on around them. It’s like politics doesn’t exist in their universe. They’re voting with the awareness level of someone trying to figure out why they have thumbs.

Let’s face it: some people just don’t keep up with current events or politics. This is the RUBI voter group — the ones who might as well be teleporting in from the Stone Age, still wrapping their heads around fire, let alone the three branches of government.

Some Mind-Boggling Stats About RUBIs

  • Swing states, weird results: In multiple swing states, Trump won, but the Republican Senate candidates tanked. Every GOP senator underperformed Trump because millions of RUBIs came to the polls, hit “Trump,” and ghosted the rest of the ballot.
  • Arizona shocker: Trump took Arizona, but Kari Lake — the MAGA queen herself — lost badly. If that doesn’t tell you something about these voters, I don’t know what will.
  • Abortion rights surprises: Trump won in several states where abortion rights ballot measures also passed. Translation? These voters aren’t toeing any Republican party line; they voted for Trump and abortion rights, and saw no contradiction there.
  • Bottom line: RUBIs aren’t committed Republicans, and maybe not Republican at all. Many aren't splitting tickets; they’re laser-focused on Trump and skipping the rest.

Hanlon’s Razor and the RUBI Mentality

There’s a saying: “Never attribute to malice that which can be explained by stupidity.” That’s Hanlon’s Razor, and wow, does it fit here. RUBIs aren’t evil masterminds plotting democracy’s downfall; they’re just fumbling through the voting booth with no clue about what’s at stake. And they’re cluelessly voting against their own interests in the process.

The Average RUBI: Cavemen with Cell Phones

Picture this: you pluck a caveman out of the Stone Age and drop him into 2024, how well would he understand what’s happening? Not at all. That’s your average RUBI voter.

RUBIs aren’t watching debates, checking out campaign ads, or reading up on issues. Hell, they might not even know the difference between Republican and Democrat, other than “one’s red, one’s blue.” When they hit the polls, it’s with a vague idea of what they “like” or who feels familiar.

Let’s Get Real: Not Everyone’s a Genius

Alright, here’s a politically incorrect alert — if blunt talk makes you squirm, I get it. But buckle up, because we need to face the facts: not everyone is out there making smart, well-informed decisions based on research and solid information.

How many stories have we seen about RUBI voters — who just handed Trump another win — now finally realizing, oh shit, maybe voting for him wasn’t such a hot idea? Seriously, check it out. It’s like watching someone stick their finger in an electrical socket twice and then wondering why they keep getting shocked. Here’s the ugly truth: some people are just dumb as fuck. There, I said it. It doesn’t feel great to admit, and yeah, it sounds harsh. But ignoring it isn’t helping anyone. This country has a significant number of clueless, caveman-level RUBIs, and they just played a massive role in swinging this election.

The sooner we face this truth, the sooner we can start making decisions that actually benefit everyone — including the RUBIs.

George Carlin nailed it: “Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that.” Let that sink in for a minute.

Want a glimpse of what I’m talking about? Check out this video clip: Andrew Callahan interviewing some voters in Pennsylvania. Watching it will either make you laugh, cry, or want to move to a deserted island.

But hey, if you’re still skeptical, hang tight. We’re just getting started.

But Come On, Nobody Is That Clueless, Right?

Oh, but they are. Yep, I’m talking about the Radically Uninformed and Blindingly Inattentive — the RUBIs. And trust me, a lot of people, especially the political establishment, just can’t wrap their heads around this.

Here’s the thing: I went to college, I follow the news, and I naturally assume others know a little about the world around them. You know, like basic stuff. How science works, how the government functions, maybe even how a woman’s body actually works (I know, high expectations). But nope — I am wrong. RUBIs aren’t just “a little different” from people like me; they’re operating on a whole other planet.

There’s actually a name for this disconnect: the “False Consensus Effect. Basically, it’s this mental glitch where we assume other people share our level of knowledge, our values, our common sense. Spoiler: they don’t. Most of us are stuck in our own little bubbles, assuming everyone else is paying attention and trying to be informed. But they’re not. Some people — millions of them — don’t know a damn thing about what’s going on.

The Hard Truth: RUBIs Aren’t Paying Attention

And when I say they’re out of touch, I mean seriously out of touch. Here’s a mind-blower for you: only 37% of U.S. adults have a bachelor’s degree or higher. The other 63%? They either didn’t finish college, barely scraped through high school, or dropped out. Look, I’m not saying that not having a degree means you’re dumb — not at all. But here’s the uncomfortable reality: there’s a strong link between education and things like media literacy, political engagement, and critical thinking.

Here’s what that looks like:

  • Media Literacy: Higher education usually boosts your ability to critically assess information. It helps you spot bias, recognize fake news, and figure out which sources are trustworthy.
  • Political Engagement: People who have gone further in school tend to be more politically active. They vote, they talk about issues, and they generally know what’s up in the world.
  • Critical Thinking: Higher education doesn’t just fill your brain with facts; it builds your ability to reason, evaluate arguments, and actually make sense of things.

So, guess what? RUBIs don’t have media literacy, aren’t politically engaged, and definitely aren’t exercising critical thinking. That’s what makes them RUBIs in the first place.

And look, I’ll let you decide if voting against your own damn self-interest makes someone “stupid.” But in my book? Yeah, it kinda does.

Just a Few of the Things RUBIs Don’t Understand

politics elections referendums ballot measures
voter suppression the electoral college what government does the branches of government
separation of powers checks and balances impeachment presidential immunity
democracy authoritarianism fascism socialism
communism capitalism social justice the legislative process
the filibuster gerrymandering lobbying public opinion and polling
Project 2025 the judicial system the supreme court the legal system
criminal justice ethics diplomacy and foreign policy international relations
geopolitics national security sanctions the United Nations
economics monetary policy tariffs inflation
labor markets collective bargaining world trade and global markets taxes and tax brackets
child tax credits supply chains whatever the fuck an "opportunity economy" is basic financial literacy
financing and credit welfare consumer behavior science of any kind
the scientific method evolution and natural selection space and the solar system computers and technology
artificial intelligence social media cybersecurity cryptocurrency
vaccination and immunization disease prevention and public health nutrition anatomy
female reproductive system sexual health abortion transgender anything
genetics US history world history climate change
environmental sustainability renewable energy Christianity world religions other than Christianity
cause and effect (unless it's super basic and directly observable) correlation is not causation logical fallacies statistics and data interpretation

The Classic RUBI Move: “Biden Hasn’t Really Done Anything”

Here’s a little gem for you. A friend told me about a female Hispanic coworker who voted for Trump with the classic reason: “Biden hasn’t really done anything.” This, my friends, is RUBI logic at its finest — totally blind to the big picture.

Let’s be real: RUBIs have no clue how the political system actually works. Most couldn’t name the branches of government if their life depended on it. So when Republicans go full obstruction mode and block everything Democrats try to do, RUBIs are left with nothing but the soundbite: “See? The Democrat didn’t get anything done.” Convenient, right?

Remember this?

  • Back in 2010, Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell straight-up said, “The single most important thing we want to achieve is for President Obama to be a one-term president.” No subtlety, just full-scale sabotage.
  • Fast forward to February 2024: Trump himself opposed a bipartisan border security bill, openly urging Republican lawmakers to block it just to deny Biden a win.

And this is just a sample of the GOP’s “stop them at all costs” playbook. But are RUBIs aware of any of this? Hell no. Because they’re not paying attention. So instead, they’re out there thinking Biden hasn’t done anything, blissfully unaware of the constant roadblocks thrown in his way.

Are RUBIs Bad People? And Why the Hell Are They Wrecking the Country?

Look, RUBIs aren’t evil. Demonizing them misses the entire point. Here’s the deal: they’re not out there trying to burn the country down; they’re just trying to get by, like the rest of us. As one Democratic voter with RUBI relatives put it:

“I look at my family — half unemployed, a mom working in public education, a relative who just started a small business, and two parents with no retirement plan. The policies Harris would’ve put in place? They’d actually help these people. But I get why they voted Trump. The last couple of years have sucked for them, and while I’ve felt the economic pinch, I’m doing okay. I hurt for them because they think Trump’s in their corner. They’re good people. They’re not Nazis or bigots. They’re just frustrated and feel left behind.”

Most folks, RUBIs included, are doing the best they can with what they know. The problem? They’re working with bare-bones information at best. My definition of a “bad person” is someone who’s malicious. And yeah, we’ve got some of those in this country — people who genuinely don’t give a damn about anyone else. But that’s not who we’re talking about here.

Most RUBIs are decent people, but they lack the education, media literacy, and critical thinking skills to be truly informed and engaged. Trump figured that out and knew exactly how to play them. He sold them a story, and they bought it. But here’s the tragic irony: the policies he’s pushing will hit RUBIs the hardest.

Take tariffs, for example. Trump’s obsession with them is about to fuck over American businesses, and, you guessed it, a ton of RUBIs are going to lose their jobs. They’re literally voting against their own interests. And because they don’t understand cause and effect all that well, they probably won’t connect the dots and realize it was Trump’s policies that did this to them. Meanwhile, Republicans will happily turn around and blame the whole mess on the Democrats. (“Thanks, Obama!”)

So, are RUBIs bad people? No. But their gullibility? That could end up doing some serious damage to the country unless we figure out how to actually reach them.

Why RUBIs Gravitate Toward “Strong Men” in Tough Times

When RUBIs feel the walls closing in — when their finances are in the gutter and life feels out of control — they start looking around for a “strong man” to fix things. They want someone who’ll roll in, take charge, and make the scary stuff go away.

So, why the obsession with “strong men”? Let’s break it down:

  • Evolution and History: Since the dawn of time, men were the hunters, protectors, and fighters, and this crap stuck. Our caveman ancestors looked to the “strongest” guy to get them through, and somehow, this reflex is still wired into us. When a crisis hits, people instinctively turn to what feels familiar—someone who looks tough and “in charge” (even if he’s full of it).
  • Cultural Stereotypes and Psychology: Society has drummed into us that men are assertive, bold, and decisive—perfect traits for a crisis, right? This is classic “uncertainty aversion”: people hate chaos and are drawn to anyone who projects confidence. And traditionally, that’s been men.

In political lingo, we call these types “strongmen”—authoritarian types who act tough, talk tough, and bulldoze anyone in their way. People (especially RUBIs) see these guys as the fixers and problem-solvers, even though, in reality, these “strongmen” usually come with a nasty side of authoritarianism and don’t give a damn about democracy. But hey, people love a tough guy, right?

Let’s Be Real: Most of These “Strong Men” Are Just Whiny Man-Babies

Look, I get it — talking about “strong men” feels ridiculous and offensive. If we’re honest, we know women are just as strong (if not stronger) in countless ways. But we’re talking about RUBIs here, not modern nuanced reality. RUBIs are sold on the image of a tough, decisive “man’s man.” And here’s the kicker: most of these “strong men” aren’t even strong. Look at Trump. He’s a whiny man-baby hiding behind his platform shoes and comb-over. But because he projects a certain persona, he fits the RUBI fantasy of a leader who “gets things done.”

So, What Exactly Are RUBIs Looking for in a “Strong Man”?

RUBIs don’t want policy details or logical arguments — they want a guy who makes them feel secure. Here’s how a “strong man” checks all their boxes:

  • Strength and Decisiveness: They want someone who looks like they can get shit done. The kind of leader who says, “Here’s what we’re doing,” no questions asked. Policies? Nah, RUBIs just want a guy who projects power.
  • Simple Messaging: RUBIs aren’t here for a TED Talk. They like direct, no-nonsense language that’s easy to understand. “Strong men” keep it simple, skip the fluff, and sound relatable—or at least authoritative enough to shut down further questions.
  • Charisma: RUBIs eat up charisma. A “strong man” knows how to work a crowd, and RUBIs are drawn to the confidence, boldness, and drama like moths to a flame. They see him as a problem-solver, a “fixer.”
  • Security and Stability: When times are tough, “strong men” promise safety and order. RUBIs want someone who makes the chaos feel under control—whether or not it actually is.
  • Simplified Good vs. Bad: RUBIs love a black-and-white story. A “strong man” gives them a simple narrative—us vs. them, good vs. bad. No gray area, no complexity. Just heroes and villains.

Sound familiar? It should. This is exactly why Trump appealed to RUBIs — and why every “strong man” archetype appeals to the masses in a crisis. It’s visceral, it’s primal, and, unfortunately, it works.

Trump: The Unlikely “Politician” We Can’t Seem to Shake

Alright, let’s talk about Trump. Believe me, I’d love nothing more than to never have to mention his fucking name again. But here we are. The guy’s a total anomaly because, let’s face it, Trump isn’t a politician. He had zero experience in politics before 2016, and honestly, you could argue he still hasn’t learned a damn thing since.

He doesn’t know policy, he’s famously allergic to reading those daily national security briefings, and yet, here he is. Trump’s one of only a handful of pop culture icons who managed to cross over into politics. Think about it:

  • Ronald Reagan: Before becoming the 40th President, Reagan was a Hollywood actor.
  • Arnold Schwarzenegger: Action star turned Governor of California.
  • Jesse Ventura: Former wrestler and actor who went on to become Governor.
  • Donald Trump: Real estate tycoon and TV personality, best known for “You’re fired!” on The Apprentice.

For most voters, these backgrounds make no sense for political qualifications. But for RUBIs? These guys are perfect — they’re familiar, they’re “successful,” and, for some reason, they feel trustworthy.

So, what exactly do RUBIs know about Trump?

  • He Was President: They know he was the guy before Biden. He beat Hillary Clinton (and no, they probably don’t remember who her running mate was either).
  • He’s a “Billionaire Businessman”: RUBIs think “rich guy who owns lots of stuff”—buildings, golf courses, a brand. They see wealth and assume success, with no idea about his bankruptcies or business failures.
  • He’s “The TV Guy”: To RUBIs, Trump is the “You’re fired!” guy.The Apprentice made him look like a decisive, no-nonsense boss, which is just the image they like.
  • He “Tells It Like It Is”: RUBIs eat this up. Trump’s blunt, unfiltered style—no political correctness, no niceties—feels “honest” to them. They think, “He’s saying what he really thinks, so he must be authentic.”

And that’s it. Seriously, that’s all they know. They don’t know he’s been bankrupt multiple times, impeached twice, and entangled in more scandals than we can count. They don’t know he tried to overthrow democracy. All they see is a straight-talking, wealthy TV guy who’s been President. And in their minds, that’s more than enough.

Trump’s “Celebrity Shortcut”

Here’s the thing: Trump has a massive advantage over every other politician out there because he’s a celebrity. His fame gives him a “Celebrity Shortcut” straight to RUBI hearts, bypassing all the hurdles regular politicians face. For most politicians, it’s an uphill battle just to get people to know who the hell they are, let alone understand their policies and actually like them. Trump skipped all that crap. He’s just like Reagan and Schwarzenegger in this way—people already knew him, already had an opinion, and, in a weird way, already trusted him.

In 2015, Trump entered the race as that guy, the wealthy, ballsy, no-nonsense TV personality yelling, “You’re fired!” on The Apprentice. To RUBIs, he’s still that guy: the successful billionaire who speaks his mind. They love his blunt, unfiltered style. Political correctness? Please. RUBIs see his straight talk as honesty and authenticity. “He tells it like it is!” they say. They’re all in.

And let’s be real—love him or hate him, Trump isn’t boring. He stands out. And to RUBIs, that’s golden.

Regular Politicians Are Boring AF

Now, let’s talk about the rest of them. To RUBIs, most politicians are basically invisible. They’re boring people talking about boring issues RUBIs don’t understand, don’t care about, and aren’t going to pay attention to. Think back to that lineup of ten Republicans in 2015. Who the hell were any of them? And who in that bunch would a RUBI be most drawn to? Yup — Donald fucking Trump. No wonder he stole the show.

2015 GOP debate

Kamala Harris: A Total Mystery to RUBIs

Kamala Harris? To a RUBI, she’s practically a ghost. Sure, some of them might know she’s the Vice President. Maybe. But they don’t know her policies, her background, or even her personality. To RUBIs, she’s a smiling, nice person with no real connection to their lives. Plus, deep-rooted biases against women in power don’t help. These people don’t get her, and they’re not motivated to.

I’m still floored by how many women threw their support behind Trump, considering his stellar track record with women (read: it’s terrible). And it’s not just women — it’s Black voters, people of color, and especially immigrants who somehow thought, Yeah, this guy’s my pick! It’s mind-blowing. But here’s the hard truth: RUBIs come in all shapes and sizes, and they’re all vulnerable to the same manipulation tactics. Trump’s got a knack for tapping into their frustrations and fears, and they keep lining up to support him because they think he’s going to help them.

So, here’s the kicker: after everything we know about RUBIs, think about putting forward a candidate like Kamala Harris — a woman of color who, to RUBIs, was practically an unknown. What do you think happened?

Just to be clear, I’m a huge Kamala fan. I think she would’ve been a fantastic president, and watching her lose hurt — bad. And it wasn’t just a close call; she was crushed. Looking back, I get it now. Kamala Harris, as great as she is, was a spectacularly poor choice for a candidate if the goal was to appeal to RUBIs. Against someone like Trump, a well-known, larger-than-life figure, she never stood a chance with these voters.

The 2024 Election: A RUBI Reality Check

Let’s get real: RUBIs are struggling — money issues are hitting them hard. When politicians talk about “the economy,” RUBIs hear “Can I afford groceries this month?” For them, “the economy” is their own bank balance, not some abstract national metric.

So, when a pollster or political consultant throws out, “Is the country on the right track?” RUBIs give a resounding “No.” Why? Because if their world feels off track, the whole damn country must be too. Same goes for “presidential approval ratings.” If a RUBI’s broke, they’ll assume the President is screwing it up, whether it’s actually his fault or not. That’s just how it works in their world.

On one side of this election, we’ve got Donald Trump. And let’s be honest — he was exactly what RUBIs were looking for:

  • He’s not a boring politician.
  • He’s loud, confident, and a straight shooter (at least in their eyes).
  • And to them, he’s the billionaire business whiz who “gets things done.”

On the other hand, we had Kamala Harris. She’s the VP, seems nice, but to RUBIs? She was a total mystery. Here’s what went through a RUBI’s mind:

  • “Isn’t she Biden’s right-hand person? So why hasn’t she fixed anything?”
  • “Wait, why is she even running? Did Biden lose his marbles or something?”
  • “BTW if she knew how to help people like me, wouldn’t she have done it by now?”

RUBIs wanted a leader who promised straightforward relief, because they’re just trying to survive. So when Kamala rolled out campaign promises like tax credits for first-time homebuyers or small business deductions, it all sounded like just more abstract politician-speak. Trump, meanwhile, went for simple, direct promises like cutting taxes on overtime and tips — things that actually affect the average worker’s wallet right now.

Bottom line: Trump told them he’d fix their problems. He didn’t need a detailed plan because, for RUBIs, bold talk sounds better than policy papers. He reached people where they hurt, while Kamala’s well-meaning but complex plans just didn’t connect. And that’s why, in the end, the RUBIs voted for Trump.

Hold Up — Don’t These People Normally Skip Voting?

Well, yeah. Typically, RUBIs find politics boring as hell and avoid voting like the plague. They’re usually the stay-home, don’t-give-a-shit crowd. But 2024 threw a couple of major curveballs their way:

  • Financial pain was off the charts, and when people are hurting, they get motivated. Nothing like a good dose of economic suffering to get folks off the couch.
  • EVERYBODY was saying “GO VOTE!” And somehow, this time, the message actually got through to the RUBIs.
  • The “GO VOTE” message was all nice and polite, without the handy little reminder, “Oh, by the way, vote for Kamala, not Trump!” So they showed up all pumped to “make a difference.”

And, well, they did show up…they just happened to cast their vote for Trump.

Why the Political Establishment Has It All Wrong

Here’s where things get really frustrating. Democrats are out of touch and missing the forest for the trees. They think voters are driven by nuanced issues and thoughtful policy positions. Some certainly are, but RUBIs aren’t — they’re not clued into specific issues tied to their identity. They’re simply surviving. (Oh, and they just swung the whole fucking election to Trump.)

If Democrats want RUBIs to listen, they need to offer real solutions to their real-world issues, not pie-in-the-sky promises. Stop acting like people care about every issue on the party platform. RUBIs want to know how the hell they’re going to afford rent, not get a lecture on saving democracy.

Winning Over RUBIs: A Lesson in Doing Something Different

Want to win over RUBIs? It’s time for a radical shift. Insanity is doing the same thing over and over but expecting different results. Stop wasting $1 billion on political ads and policies that don’t mean squat to RUBIs. It’s time to get down in the trenches, speak their language, and offer solutions they actually understand and care about. (Minimum wage, anyone?)

The “Celebrity Shortcut”: Can Democrats Use Trump’s Trick?

If the Democrats were smart, they’d look at Trump’s success and think, Hey, maybe we should try the same damn thing. The “Celebrity Shortcut” is real, folks, and it’s how Trump managed to breeze past traditional politicians. Ideally, the Dems would find someone who hits that RUBI sweet spot — a “strong man” type who looks like he could pull the country out of whatever mess is coming next, thanks in no small part to Trump and the Republicans.

But here’s the rub: a standard, boring politician isn’t going to cut it for the RUBIs. Let’s break it down:

  • Gavin Newsome, Josh Shapiro, Wes Moore, J.B. Pritzker, Roy Cooper, and all the other solid-but-forgettable political names? Sorry, fellas. You’re great politicians, but RUBIs don’t know you, and they’re not going to. Not going to happen.
  • Kamala Harris, Gretchen Whitmer, or any other woman? Listen, it pains me to say this, but RUBIs probably aren’t ready for a female president. The country’s still got a major sexism problem, and it’s not going anywhere anytime soon. It sucks, but there it is.
  • Pete Buttigieg or anyone who’s gay? Again, hate to say it, but a large part of the RUBI crowd isn’t there yet. Believe me, I’m a huge Mayor Pete fan and admire him immensely. But as much as it kills me, we’re probably not ready for a gay president. Not with this crowd.

So, if none of these folks are going to work, then who are we talking about here?

The Ideal Candidate to Win Over RUBIs Would Be…

  • A “strong man” type — someone who’s smart, confident, straight-talking, and yes, charismatic as hell.
  • A familiar face that RUBIs already know from pop culture. Think an actor, musician, or comedian.
  • Someone widely liked. Sounds simplistic? Yep. But it matters.
  • Someone who doesn’t talk down to them — makes them feel good, relatable, and understood.
  • An “everyman” who doesn’t feel like a politician at all.
  • Someone they trust to handle the complex stuff so they don’t have to worry about it.
  • Someone they believe will make a real, visible difference in their everyday lives.

So, who comes to mind? Think on it, because if the Democrats want to win over RUBIs, they’re going to need someone who checks all those boxes, not just a “nice guy” with policy papers.

Oh and by the way, the Republicans Are Fucked in 2028

Here’s a juicy little nugget to brighten your day: after this term, Trump is out. And who’s lined up to take the GOP reins? You got it — just a bunch of unrelatable, extreme, boring-as-hell Republican politicians. You really think JD Vance or any of those other MAGA weirdos are going to fire up the RUBIs? Not a chance in fucking hell.

Wouldn’t it be some sweet, karmic justice to turn the tables and watch Democrats “pull a Trump” for 2028? Imagine them rolling out a candidate who knows how to play the “Celebrity Shortcut” game just as well. Gets my blood pumping just thinking about it.

Putting It All Together

If Democrats want to start reclaiming this country, they’ve got some work to do, but it’s not rocket science. Here’s the playbook:

  • Step 1: Find a candidate who actually resonates with RUBIs. Not someone who talks like a policy wonk, but someone who feels like a real, down-to-earth person who gets it. Someone who doesn’t need a stage and a teleprompter to be engaging (looking at you, Trump).
  • Step 2: Speak RUBI. Forget the ten-point plans and political buzzwords. Get straight to the heart of what people are feeling. Keep it real, keep it simple, and talk about the things that actually keep folks up at night: rent, groceries, job stability, and dignity.
  • Step 3: Make a real, immediate impact. No more promises that sound good on paper but don’t make it past the voting booth. If the Democrats want to win over the RUBIs, they need to make a difference that’s obvious and tangible in people’s lives — like, “feel it in your bank account” kind of obvious.

It sounds simple, right? Well, that’s because it is. Not easy, but simple. And look, screaming at the top of our lungs about “saving democracy” or “being on the right side of history” isn’t the answer here. Instead, we need to sit down, listen up, and figure out what makes the average American’s day a little bit easier.

Maybe that’s the real key to victory — not treating this as a battle of left vs. right, but as a battle to give every person a little more stability, a little more security, and maybe even a reason to believe things can get better. Because here’s the thing: we can do better than Trump. But to make that happen, we’ve got to start where the RUBIs are, not where we think they should be.

So here’s to 2028 — may we bring in a candidate who understands the heart of America, who doesn’t need a reality show to be relatable, and who can finally give the RUBIs a reason to believe in something better.

To close, here’s a powerful quote from another Democratic voter:

“For the most part, these Trump voters aren’t Nazis. They’re not bigots. They’re people who just want their lives to get better. They want their struggles recognized and addressed. Sure, Trump’s promises are as empty as his tinman heart, but a lot of his voters are genuinely voting for hope. And we’ve failed them. We’ve been so busy (and rightfully) outraged at what a garbage human Trump is that we haven’t looked at what it is about his platform that appeals to people. We’re stuck in the ‘they must be fascists, too’ mindset and missed the fact that maybe our policies don’t address their struggles. No, they’re not voting in their own best interest. But if we want to turn things around, we’ve got to understand why they think they are.

There it is. The path to victory isn’t about shouting louder; it’s about listening, understanding, and actually delivering.


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